Sunday, June 05, 2005

Mocking Myron's (Lest We Forget)

Geoff Trainor

Myron's, you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainyWell . . . you knew it was coming right? I had been trying to decide what venue to do first. I thought to myself, "I shouldn't do Myron's first, that wouldn't be fair". Then I was reading an one of Casey's posts and looked up at the banner,"Mocking Music," and realized . . . Mocking Myron's? I think so.

Okay, so I suppose you can get from that intro (and other comments made previously) that I really didn't like Myron's that much. Cover was expensive, food was expensive, and drinks were REALLY expensive. Cover, like most places depended on the night, and what bands might be playing. I've heard cover being upwards of 45 dollars, although I've never personally seen it that high.

Myron's consists of three floors. I have no clue what is down stairs short of a coat check. The main floor consists of a more loungey-like atmosphere, with two stages for bands. Upstairs consists of a dance floor (black lights and all), pool tables, and if my count is right, 4 places from which to purchase alcohol from (three in the main dance room, and larger one outside with the pool tables). Downstairs is where, generally, I could be found when I went but sometimes when I got drunk enough . . . I will admit that I found my way to the dance floor.

Mmm...wet and foamy girl...
Creepy Guy: "Ahh, sorry, didn't mean to touch you there, couldn't see through the foam"

As a venue for music, it seemed to be the most popular on PEI (especially since the demise of The Barn). True, it did host a variety of good music, Matt Good, 54-40, Bif Naked & Alexisonfire all graced the stage there. The problem is what happen on the other nights, mainly Thursday-Saturday. I've had the unfortunate opportunity to go to Myron's with people from work several times during 2002-2003. Walking in, you are instantly transported to a world of creepy old men trying to pick up 19 year old girls, and creepy little boys trying to pick up 19 year old girls.

I think the best experience I've ever had at Myron's was when I was there to see 54-40. The band did a pretty good set, but that has nothing to do with it. You see, there was this woman, probably late 40s, and the this incredibly geeky-looking guy, probably early 20s. They were "dancing". Now, it's not the age difference that really matters, it's just a factor to add to the amusement. The woman was kind of watching the band, drink in hand, and the guy was holding open his leather trench coat (ala Matrix, obviously trying to look cool) with one hand kinda shaking it around in a sort of faux-grind. Casey was there, perhaps his memory of the moment is better. What matters is, I demonstrated this to everyone at work the next day . . . which I suppose made me look a little creepy to anyone who wasn't in on the story.

The last time I was at Myron's was for the Alexisonfire show a couple months back. Sadly, I decided to stay on the main floor where Alexisonfire was. Considering it was a Myron's Chem-Free show, I'm sure there were tons of prostitots upstairs on the dance floor. Which would explain where a few of the people that didn't seem to fit in came from . . . although that didn't occur to me at the time.
Myron's War
I searched google and found this, Myron's War. Fitting? Well...not really

Sadly, Myron's is no more. After the Sheriff seized their liquor, it was only a matter of time. They stayed open dry for a little while but a bar with no liquor is like Geoff with no Star Wars. There have been rumors flying around about new ownership, but so far no one seems to really know what's going on. Worry not though. It seems most of the bands that generally go to Myron's are now going to either The Wave, or Brennan's. As for the prostitots, there's always JR's and Breakers . . . err . . . uh, Velvet Underground (how dare they steal such a great band's name for such a dirty bar).

I do not miss Myron's, nor do I miss the skanky atmosphere that surrounded it. As a venue for bands it could never quite make it as, no matter who you booked, you always get the same crowd. Although they apparently have some great fish n' chips.

Obi-Wan said it best, "Myron's Cabaret...You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy...we must be cautious".

Rating: D- (Avoided an F because of a great Alexisonfire show)

Alexisonfire - No Transitory
Bif Naked - We're Not Gonna Take It (Streaming Video)
Matthew Good (Band) - The Workers Sing a Song of Mass Production
Matthew Good (Band) - Everything is Automatic
Matthew Good (Band) - The Future Is X-Rated
Matthew Good - Pledge of Allegiance
Matthew Good - Alert Status Red
Rise Against - Give It All Streaming Video (56k) (300k)
54-40 - Goodbye Flatland (Entire Album Stream)

Comments on "Mocking Myron's (Lest We Forget)"


Anonymous mOe said ... (5/6/05 10:21 pm) : 

the only thing i miss is the free ticket to any show, so long as i was there to take pictures. and the guest pass so i could torture a friend.

they had a black light upstairs? heh.

and the downstairs also had a smoking room i think. and a vip room with a couple of pool tables. i only know this because rollins had his stag party there.
i swear.

you forgot to mention the posibility of contracting random vd's.

i missed the 54-40 show. still wish i was able to have made it.


Blogger Casey Dorrell said ... (6/6/05 2:52 am) : 

You didn't miss much. I love old 54-40 - well, maybe not love, but like quite a bit - but the show was a weird mixture of passably good and embarassing. They were dressing and sounding somewhat like some socal emo group or something, pretending to be in their early 20s.


Blogger mel said ... (6/6/05 4:06 am) : 

I've only ever really gone to myron's on the weekend once. It's the result of moving away just as I reached legal age/not caring beforehand/and not wanting to associate myself with the place. I laughed when I found out it closed, then I laughed at the people who seemed to be upset about it. Good riddance.

Although I was disappointed when I missed Bif there, last summer when I was home.


Blogger Geoff Trainor said ... (6/6/05 1:32 pm) : 

I'm sure the Bif show at The Wave earlier that year was better anyhow.


Anonymous mOe said ... (7/6/05 1:01 am) : 

if you mean better as in sucked ass then yeah. it was better.


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